Today is Your Birthday!

Do you know what today is?

TODAY IS MY BIRTHDAY!!!!!!!!!

I ate cake. I got cards. Ben bought me Toms!!!!!!!! Piggy sent me a card in the mail.

That's all I have to write today. I'm super stressed and I have a lot to do. I promise I will catch up with you after the beginning of next week once everything for "Gifted" is through.

And post pictures.

I may not have any hair left.

Random Fact: I painted two Auburn signs tonight. I think I have a rash.

The Truth

My old friend Courtney over at Live Beautiful has posted a challenge that she is calling the "30 Days of Truth." I think it's pretty cool (and we all know how much I love a list), and I think I'm going to try it out.

I'm supposed to go day by day, taking one topic at a time and tell the truth. These could be a little difficult and make me, or you, the reader, uncomfortable. Please remember that these are opinion based. If you don't like what I have to say, then do this challenge on your own blog and voice your own opinions. :)

The list is:

Day 1: Something you hate about yourself.
Day 2: Something you love about yourself.
Day 3: Something you have to forgive yourself for.
Day 4: Something you have to forgive someone for.
Day 5: Something you hope to do in your life.
Day 6: Something you hope you never have to do.
Day 7: Someone who has made your life worth living for.
Day 8: Someone who made your life hell, or treated you like s***.
Day 9: Someone you didn’t want to let go, but just drifted.
Day 10: Someone you need to let go, or wish you didn’t know.
Day 11: Something people seem to compliment you the most on.
Day 12: Something you never get compliments on.
Day 13: A band or artist that has gotten you through some tough ass days. (write a letter.)
Day 14: A hero that has let you down. (letter)
Day 15: Something or someone you couldn’t live without, because you’ve tried living without it.
Day 16: Someone or something you definitely could live without.
Day 17: A book you’ve read that changed your views on something.
Day 18: Your views on gay marriage.
Day 19: What do you think of religion? Or what do you think of politics?
Day 20: Your views on drugs and alcohol.
Day 21: (scenario) Your best friend is in a car accident and you two got into a fight an hour before. What do you do?
Day 22: Something you wish you hadn’t done in your life.
Day 23: Something you wish you had done in your life.
Day 24: Make a playlist to someone, and explain why you chose all the songs. (Just post the titles and artists and letter)
Day 25: The reason you believe you’re still alive today.
Day 26: Have you ever thought about giving up on life? If so, when and why?
Day 27: What’s the best thing going for you right now?
Day 28: What if you were pregnant or got someone pregnant, what would you do?
Day 29: Something you hope to change about yourself. And why.
Day 30: A letter to yourself: tell yourself EVERYTHING you love about yourself.

In other words, I'm supposed to be completely honest about each of these things for 30 days.

DAY 1 OF THIRTY DAYS OF TRUTH:

Something you hate about yourself.

Wow. Something I hate about myself?

I usually avoid these deep thinking, self exploring type probes because they make me very self-aware and I find more than just one thing and I get really depressed.

The truth is, there are lots of things I don't like about myself.

I don't like that I am loud and sometimes overbearing.

I don't like that I get uncomfortable in social situations and the only way I know to overcome it is by becoming a comedian.

I don't like that I have a flat tire that becomes a muffin top when I put my pants on.

I don't like that I let my emotions get the best of me when arguing with my husband.

I don't like that I fear confrontation and don't stand up for myself when I should.

I don't like when I do stand up for myself and I do it the wrong way and hurt that person.

I don't like that there are so many things in my life that I regret doing (or not doing).

I don't like that I look to blame everyone else but me when I know my butt is in trouble.

I don't like that I am almost a perfectionist, and if I don't like something I'm working on, I throw it away.

I don't like that I have zero patience and little compassion.

I don't like that I don't fit in when I am in a big group of girls.

See? I don't like a lot of things about myself. Now I'm depressed. So, I'm going to be a rebel. I'm going to do two days in one!

DAY 2:

Something you love about yourself.

I love that I am a rebel and do things that I want to do.

I love that I can usually find the upside, even if it takes a while.

I love that I can make people laugh, even if it's just by a stupid dance or silly face.

I love that I am crafty and get compliments on things I make.

I love that people want to be my friend (and someone wanted to be my husband!).

I love that I am strong and persistent.

I love that I am an individual because God made me that way.

I love that I don't have to fit in.

I love that I used to weigh 40 pounds more than I do now and people recognize that I've lost weight. :)

I love that I am content in myself with all my flaws and mistakes, and am able to continue on with life.

So, there it is. The 30 Days of Truth have started. I hope you enjoy them.

On an update note, this week is my birthday!!!!!! YAY!!!!! Ben and I are going to dinner with his mom to celebrate tonight. Then I will have cake at work on Wednesday (my actual birthday), and cupcakes at Bible Study on Thursday (I throw my own parties). I love my birthday!!!!! I will be 24. So much older and wiser than 23.

Then, on Saturday, Ben and I are waking up mondo early to head to Dothan for Jayla's wedding shower. After that, we are going to my favorite event of all time:

THE NATIONAL PEANUT FESTIVAL.

Yes, THE National Peanut Festival. I know you are jealous. I have never missed one in my whole entire life. I am stoked.

Enjoy your Sunday. Unfortunately, we didn't go to church this morning. Ben worked last night and didn't get home until after 2am. He needed to rest and 8am Sunday School was not going to happen. He's passed out on the couch right now with Charlotte. Absolutely precious.

Random Fact About Me: Yes, I throw my own parties. I love parties. I feel like if there is a reason to throw a party, then there should be a party. On my one year anniversary of being with my company, I brought breakfast for everyone. For my birthday, I am bringing cupcakes for everyone at Bible Study. I love parties.

Mamma Mia

TA-DA!!!!

It has taken me three days to write this post, by the way.

Pictures from Atlanta! Mom and I had the best time just having "girl time." Since Mom lives so far away, we love getting to squeeze as much time as possible out of each other when we're together. She's my best friend!

And I have a super awesome, amazing, sweet, caring, kind, loving, and generous husband who lets me spend 4 whole days away from home so that I can spend time with my Mom. Thanks, Boosef. I owe you one. :)

We stayed at the Loews-Atlanta Hotel in Midtown. Piggy had been talking for weeks about getting a free robe at the hotel. As soon as we walked in the door of the room, he somehow ended up with it on and he was lounging on the bed. What a slob.

I get a really sweet discount on this fabulous hotel because my company owns and manages the building. So we get to stay 5-Star while paying 3-Star. And you know how much I love a bargain!

We decided to go for sushi for dinner. I got Mom to try sushi when we went to the beach together over the summer. She LOVED it! So, we walked across the street from the hotel and went to Ra, for delicious and yummy sushi! The one in the front is the Viva Las Vegas roll - crab and spicy something. YUMO! The one in the back was an eel roll. It was soooooooo good. :)

The next morning, Mom and I went to the Georgia Aquarium where we saw all sorts of amazing creatures. It was an awesome aquarium. I love to go to things like this.

I always wonder HOW people don't believe in a Divine Creator when they witness things like this octopus. There is no way that something so intricate, so beautiful, so perfect could have been made by a big bang. It had to have been made at the hands of God.

After the aquarium and a quick cookie snack, Mom and I headed over to the World of Coca-Cola across the park from the Aquarium. I had already been here once with Ben, but it is loads of fun and I was happy to go back with Mom.

The World of Coke is full of Coke memorabilia, artifacts, and super cool Coke stuff. Plus you get to taste Coke products from all over the world at the end. It is lots of fun!

They have a whole section of pop-art centered around Coke. This was my favorite.

When we finished with the Coke factory (and I had bought a Coke tshirt), we wanted to enjoy the beautiful day a little more, so we walked over to Centennial Park. When the Olympics were in Atlanta in 1996, all the impressive ceremonial stuff was in this park area. It's a central location right smack in downtown. The Olympic rings above are water fountains that shoot synchronized water up. We sat here for quite a while watching kids (and a few adults) play in the water.

We didn't take a picture of our dinner hilarity that night, but it was quite the adventure. We decided we wanted Italian food. I had looked up restaurant reviews before we left and had read about a restaurant called Baraonda just a few blocks away from the hotel. I figured we could walk there, so we got dressed and set out. After we walked about 4 blocks, we realized we had walked 4 blocks in the wrong direction, turned around, and then walked 4 back, and then an additional 5.

Dinner was DELICIOUS, but we took a cab back. :) Really though. Dinner was delicious. Mom had mushroom ravioli and I had homemade lasagna. They had an amazing wine list, and we split a warm apple tart with gelato for dessert. YUM.

The next morning, we went to the Margaret Mitchell House. For those of you who don't know, Margaret Mitchell wrote Gone With The Wind. It is one of my all time favorite, love it, got to have it books, and movies, as well. Mom and I have shared all things Gone With The Wind my whole life, so it only made sense to go to the home where she wrote the book.

We were not allowed to take photos in the actual apartment, but we were able to stand in the corner where she kept her desk and wrote the massive novel that she only began as a hobby because she had broken her ankle and needed something to do. So she sat in a corner by a window and wrote one of the greatest love stories (or non-love stories, however you decide to look at it) of American fiction. She wasn't even going to publish it.

They had a little museum to the side with a few movie relics in it. The photo above is me standing by the actual portrait of Vivien Leigh as Scarlett O'Hara that hung in Scarlett's bedroom in the movie. It was quite stunning in person.

We left the Margaret Mitchell House and walked to the High Museum of Art, where they were having an exhibition of Salvador Dali's late works. Dali is my brother's favorite artist, so we knew we had to go. I totally got caught and yelled at for trying to sneak a cell phone picture to send to Wes. Oops.

And, then there were no more pictures. But we did go to Atlantic Station that evening for dinner at Rosa Mexicano, where they make fresh guacamole tableside (and I don't even like guacamole, but this was GOOD) and a little shopping.

We had a blast.

Mom, you are my best friend and I love you more than you know. Thanks for such a great week. I can't wait to conquer another city with you!

Random Gone With The Wind Fact: The famous "burning of Atlanta" scene is not General Sherman and the Yankees burning Atlanta as commonly thought. It's actually set a few weeks before when the Confederates burned their own arsenals so Sherman couldn't get to them. Kind of a "if we can't have it, nobody can" thing.

Oh, and look closely. Vivien Leigh had not been cast yet when that scene was filmed. In the carriage with Rhett, it's either a dummy being used or a stand-in, depending on the shot.

Wasted Time

I'M BACK!!!!!

Yes, people, I have been missing for a week. I know you have been absolutely riveted to know what has been going on in my life in the past week.

I am dripping with sarcasm.

I know you don't actually care, but I will update you anyways.

1.

Atlanta was awesome. Mom has all the pictures. I will post them as soon as she puts them on Facebook. With the pictures will come explanations of how much fun we had. Stay tuned.

2.

Charlotte did get a Halloween costume! Alas, it's not the pig costume. Ben was TOTALLY against it. He thinks Charlotte is too much of a tom-boy for the pig costume. I think she's too claustrophobic for the thing on the head. She is, really. She doesn't like to get under the blanket and hates being held too tightly. Anyways, we tried her costume on her, and it was precious, but I only got a picture on my phone (which is super ghetto and I don't have data on my phone to upload it) and the camera batteries are dead. I guess you'll have to wait until Halloween to see just how cute she is in her mystery costume...and what Ben and I will wear to match it!

3.

I'm picking up my business again. I started a little side business last Christmas called "A Pig and a Paintbrush." I do cutesy little paintings and Christmas ornaments and other fun things. I sold a couple of paintings and ornaments, but really didn't recoup what I spent last year, so I kind of hung it up. (Too be honest, I didn't try TOO hard...) But this year, a girl in our Sunday School class has been put in charge of the Women's Ministry Christmas event this year. The theme is "Gifted" and it is to celebrate the gifts that God has given the women in our church. It will be set up like a Christmas Village style bazaar, and there will be vendors, food, craft demonstrations, speakers, etc. Ashley approached me about having a vendor table to sell A Pig and a Paintbrush items at "Gifted" and I decided to do it.

3 1/2.

So, I got Ben involved! I am in love with the precious wood door hangings that I'm starting to see on front doors in neighborhoods. I've seen several in stores and was not about to buy something that I know I can make myself. I decided that would be my main focus at "Gifted," so Ben and I set out to figure out exactly how to do it. In other words, Ben got a new jig saw, sander, sawhorses, and some plywood. I got to watch him explode with testosterone while he broke that baby out of the box and put on his manly safety glasses and tear in to the wood with a Tim Allen style grunt. Then I painted. :) They are super cute. I will post pictures of those later too, once they are finished.

In all honesty, my batteries died in my camera and I know we have some extras around the house, but I don't feel like looking for them because my arm is literally shaking from holding up a giant wooden present while painting the edges.

Maybe I can talk Ben into looking for them tomorrow.

RANDOM MUSIC MONDAY!!!!!

I love love LOVE The Eagles. They are my absolute favorite band of all time. No doubt about it. One of my favorite music memories is going with my dad to the music store and buying The Eagles' Hell Freezes Over cassette tape (yes, I said cassette tape), popping it in the car, and him teaching me Eagles songs and perfect harmonies. Their music is the perfect blend of country and rock and roll. Ben and I got to see them perform last year at the BJCC, and I seriously cried. It was AWESOME.

This is my favorite Eagles song, Wasted Time. It's a perfect break up song. I would give my right arm to sing harmony with Don Henley on this one. Unfortunately, they did not perform this live when we were there. Just every other brilliant song they've ever written.

The autumn leaves have got you thinking

About the first time that you fell

You didn't love the boy too much

No, no, you just loved the boy to well

Enjoy a little Eagles on a Monday.

Random Trivia Fact: The Eagles are the greatest band of all time.

The Music Man

I love music.

Everyone who knows me knows I love music.

Good music you should feel in your soul. It should hit right in your core. It should bring up feelings from the past or get you thinking about the future. It should make you weep with sorrow or tap your toes with joy. Good lyrics should relate to you on several levels and at several different points in your life.

Or it could just be a great song that puts you in the mood to dance or sing at the top of your lungs or grab your man to lay a juicy one right on the kisser.

Either way, music is essential to life.

Think about it: do you listen to music at work? When you get in the car, do you turn the radio on? When something in life happens, does it remind you of a song? Is music not an important ingredient in your worship service?

I know you dance when no one is looking. Like a maniac.

I have a new theme. Random Music Monday.

On Mondays, I will post a video of a song and a brief description of why I like the song and why I think you would like the song. Then you should listen to it.

Simple, huh?

Today's song is one I just felt in the mood to listen to today. I LOVE John Mayer. Old John Mayer, that is. His new stuff is a little strange and his personal life gets a bit off the wall. I'm having trouble blending the two. But this is off one of my favorite albums of all time, (So much my favorite, that I have already worn out one copy and had to buy another) Heavier Things. Every song on this album is amazing. If I had to choose five CDs to take with me to a deserted island, this would be one of them.

The song is the very first one on the album, called Clarity. It's got a catchy hook, but the lyrics are about his overcoming insecurities, and that they never really go away. Some of my favorite lyric verses of all time are the first few lines of this song...

I worry I weigh three times my body

I worry I throw my fears around

But this morning

There's a calm I can't explain

The rock candy's melted

Only diamonds now remain

By the time I recognize this moment

This moment will be gone

But I will bend the light pretending

That it's somehow lingered on

Pure genius.

Anyways, this is my favorite version of it. Just John and a guitar. What he does best. I suggest pausing your other musical selections at the bottom of this page before playing the video.

Enjoy Random Music Monday. I will return after my trip with Mom!

Random John Mayer Trivia: John Mayer decided he wanted to play guitar after watching Marty McFly in the famous sock hop scene in Back To The Future. Good choice, John.

Loser

Are you kidding me?

Bama lost.

And I don't just mean "lost" in like, we gave up a good fight and I can be happy about losing to such a high caliber team. I mean "lost" as in we got straight up outplayed and pummelled. A failed fake kick attempt, a missed field goal and extra point, 8 SACKS on McElroy, and many, many, many more costly penalties that should have been easily avoidable.

I do not want to be at Bama's football practice tomorrow. Saban is going to kill them.

ANYWAYS.

I had a BLAST in Nashville for Abby's Bachelorette Party. There was lots of laughing, dancing, and staring at the oddballs that came out of the woodworks after midnight. Hopefully I will be able to post a pic soon, because I didn't use my camera at all.

I kind of have a pet peeve about everyone using their cameras to take the same picture. Just one person take a picture and post it on Facebook or email it to everyone. It's easier that way and the people in the picture don't have to stand there for forty forevers smiling and getting blinded by the multiple flashes.

I was super happy to get home today. I was greeted by my super cute shirtless and greasy husband and my extremely hyper poopy dawg. She went NUTS when I walked through the door and licked and jumped all over me and I got lots of lovin' on from the husband. It's nice to be loved.

Now, I have to get to planning Jayla's Bachelorette Weekend. And she reads this, so she is not getting a hint of information about it. It's totally a secret, which I know drives her nuts. All she knows is the weekend and, when we nail it down, the location. I love you, Jayla Pig.

(No, I did not just call my best friend a pig. I mean, I did, but there's a reason. She had a horse named Katie growing up, so she always called me "Katie Horse." She had a pig at one point that her brother won in the Greasy Pig contest at the Peanut Festival one year, so naturally, she became "Jayla Pig." It's always been like that.)

Tonight, Ben's "Nanny" and "DaddyJohn" are passing through town, so we are going to have dinner with them, probably. I absolutely love Nanny and DaddyJohn. Nanny is the quintessential Southern Belle who loves to entertain in her home, is always welcoming to anyone she meets, and thinks very carefully about what she says before she says it. DaddyJohn is such a sweet man with a kind heart. Some of Ben's fondest memories are fishing with DaddyJohn and the wisdom and time they spent together. I am lucky to have people like them for in-laws.

Mom and I leave for Atlanta on Tuesday! I am more than stoked! I need a vacation!

Oh, and I made a really dumb mistake. Yahoo is my homepage at work. Every week they do a College Football post once the rankings come out. People are such idiots, saying that South Carolina should be ranked over Alabama, Boise St. should be in the National Championship, and Nebraska is overrated. They obviously have no idea how the system works.

What did I do? I created a user name on Yahoo to set the record straight. I am now obsessed. I am "that girl." I have forced myself to stop looking at the comments because they just make me angry. People are so stupid sometimes. Check the facts before you post. :)

Random Music Trivia: John Lennon's birthday was yesterday. He would have been 70, if his life had not been cut short at such a young age. Instead of a trivia fact about him, I will leave you with my FAVORITE Lennon song. Happy birthday, John Lennon. The music world greatly misses you.

Tomorrow, Tomorrow

I haven't blogged in a week. I figured, with four followers, they can't miss me too much. I was, however, extremely encouraged by people who don't officially "follow" the bloggy blog, but who commented on my Facebook about how they were blessed to read my last post.

Quit being a creeper, Nancy Pants and Jayla Day. Take the plunge and hit the follow button. It doesn't hurt. That goes for you silent creepers, too. Don't just READ the blog, PARTICIPATE in the blog. BE the blog.

I don't have any particular reason to post or anything poignant to say today, so I will just catch you up.

WHAT I'M DOING TOMORROW:

I have to work tomorrow. Yes, tomorrow is Saturday. Boo. And of course, Alabama is playing at 2:30...right in the middle of the work day. Don't tell the bossman this (oh, hey Chris, if you see this), but I may just have to bring a little portable radio with me to work tomorrow to hear Eli call the game from my desk! It's a big one! If anyone is going to beat us this season, I believe it could be South Carolina! Plus, I'm upset that I don't get to see Steve Spurrier throwing his visor and his headset around. He had a good little fit during the Auburn game. Hilarious.

BONUS POINTS!!!!

Bama DESTROYED Florida this past weekend. I've told you once that my Brosef is a huge Florida fan. I texted him with about 10 minutes to go in the 4th quarter and said, "ROOOOOOOOLLLLLLLLLLLLL TIDE! ROLL!"

In response, I get, "Wes' phone is no longer in service. Please try again tomorrow."

I text back, "Sore loser."

10 minutes later, he got a "RAMMER JAMMER YELLA HAMMER! GIVE 'EM H*** ALABAMA!!!!"

I got nothing.

BRIGHT SIDE OF TOMORROW:

Leaving immediately after work to head to Nashville for Abby's Bachelorette Party! WHOO HOO!!!!!! Abby is one of my oldest and dearest friends. We have been friends since we were in...first grade? I don't even remember, it's been so long. She is marrying Dean on the same day that Jayla, my BFFS3G (she knows what it means), is marrying Dustin. I'm Matron (HATE THAT WORD) of Honor at Jayla's wedding, and will be an "Honorary Bridesmaid" at Abby's wedding, since I won't be able to be there. I wish this girl the best. She deserves it. We will have a blast Saturday night! They are already there for tonight, but alas, I must work tomorrow.

SILVER LINING OF THE WEEK:

Bible study last night....totally wasn't Bible study. 3 of us forgot it was Thursday and didn't read what we were supposed to (we are reading through Beth Moore's So Long, Insecurity, book club style). Taryn, who was supposed to lead Bible study last night, got her signals crossed, and prepared the wrong chapters. The CLC (where we hold Bible Study) was closed at the last minute, so we headed to Starbucks and chatted for a good 2 hours. Sometimes, it's just good to sit and have girl talk. Fun, encouraging, and a nice break of the mundane work week.

And, yes, I totally forgot it was Thursday. When I pulled up the CLC and it was closed, I was REALLY confused.

SAD PART OF THE WEEK:

Charlotte is a delinquent dog and will begin obedience training in 3 weeks at PetSmart. She's super sweet, and does obey...when she wants to. But when she gets a little rowdy and out of control, there is no obedience. And forget going to PetSmart. She won't listen at all. Heel is not an option. She is not adjusting very well to the chilly weather and refuses to go outside at times. I know the neighbors think I'm crazy because I'm yelling and jumping up and down and calling her names in the backyard trying to get her to come out. She just stands in the doorway and looks at me like, "You are nuts and I am not going out there." Such a diva. We just think maybe a few weeks of obedience training will get us over the puppy hump of her life. She needs to be socialized with other dogs, leash training, and recognize our voice in public places. She is our first dog, and honestly, we don't know a lot about training her. We're doing our best!

WHAT I'M LOOKING FORWARD TO NEXT WEEK:

Mom has her fall break next week, and we are headed to Atlanta on Tuesday! We are staying at the Loews-Atlanta, which is a super swank and really amazing hotel, and going to the aquarium, Coke museum, Margaret Mitchell Museum (!), plus lots of shopping, eating, and maybe a little lounging in the hotel robes. Mom and I love spending time together. We will have a blast.

So, I will be blogging about things of importance next week...maybe.

Random Fun Fact: Watching "Say Yes To The Dress." Girls are spending THOUSANDS of dollars on gowns. Ridiculous. Mine was a couple hundred bucks and I think I looked like a million. You don't need to spend $5000 on a gown. Save that money for the marriage!

Great is Thy Faithfulness

Have you ever been whopped by God in the head?

I mean, really whopped in the head to where you get that awful feeling in the pit of your stomach? Something you totally weren't expecting and you feel like you may have just been sucker punched?

I was sucker punched yesterday.

But my life is forever changed because of it.

Let me start at Friday...

I went home this past weekend to go with Mom to Miss Peanut (yes, Miss National Peanut Festival...look it up...I was in it in my pageant hay-day!) and to spend some time with her for her birthday! My mother is amazing and I am happy to spend what time with her I can, with the distance between Birmingham and dear ole Dothan seeming sometimes like it's Birmingham and Tanzania.

I was so happy to be in Dothan. It's a wonderful town full of people I know. And they know me! It's amazing that literally everywhere we went on Friday and Saturday, we saw someone that we knew! I never thought I would sing Dothan's praises, but it really is a great town to live, work and raise a family.

Ben and I have lived in Birmingham since we were married. He was raised here. He LOVES Birmingham. But we have been wrestling lately with a huge life decision about where we are going next. Ben desperately wants to be a police officer, and with the crazy economy, nobody has any money.

Except the Dothan City Police Department.

Is Dothan where we are supposed to be? Should we completely uproot our lives? Ben's job is over at the end of this month, but mine is definitely not. I love my job and my company. I have not once thought of leaving it. Then there's our house! We've only lived in it a year. We got the first time home buyer tax credit. If we sell within 3 years, we have to pay that tax credit back! We have savings, but NOT THAT MUCH! Then we have our friends and our church and everything we have come to know since we became a married couple.

We came to the conclusion that if Dothan is where we are supposed to be, that it will just happen. He'll test, he'll pass, and we'll go. But my mind was filled with worries and doubts. Is this the right decision?

Then Sunday came.

Sunday was filled with emotion as I walked into something I was totally not expecting. I was disappointed by someone who I have looked up to my whole life and who has been in the top ten list of most influential people of my life. I was dumbfounded, lost, saddened, numb, and most of all, confused. How could this happen? Has everything that has ever been said been a lie? Has everything been a facade? Are you a hypocrite?

Sucker punch.

Then Bro. Ed says, "In times of uncertainty, where are you looking?"

WHAM. Whopped in the head. Thanks, God.

What is WRONG with me?

Then this awesome, overwhelming calm and peace came over me that I know was not me. Totally came from God. Where am I looking?

I cannot place stock in other people. People are human. Humans make mistakes. People will always let me down because people are not perfect. Everyone in some way or another will disappoint me. That's everyone. Ben, Mom, other family, friends, people who I thought were friends, people I've looked up to, people I've looked down upon. EVERYONE.

You know who will NEVER let me down? Jesus Christ. The one person who was perfect. The one person who was 100% man and 100% God. The one who made Himself like me to experience my life so He could lay His life down for me so that I could be forgiven and worship Him forever in His kingdom as a redeemed child of God (Philippians 3:5-11)!

How awesome is that?

Why am I worried about how other people affect me? Why am I hurt and disappointed in someone so stupid as a human? It is bound to happen! We are imperfect creatures! We are sinners by nature. We will disappoint.

How do I overcome it? I forgive. I show grace. I give love. I move forward. I don't hold grudges against the person who has wronged me.

Why? Because I disappoint Jesus just about every second of every day and he forgives, shows grace, gives love, moves forward, and doesn't hold grudges against me. We are to love as we are loved, and to forgive as we are forgiven.

As I knelt at the altar of the Lord yesterday, I asked for forgiveness for myself. Forgiveness of of my stupidity. I put way too much into people and not enough into God. I gave it all up yesterday. The pain, the hurt, the worries, the doubt, the decisions, the problems...all up.

And the peace arrived swiftly, like the wind.

I no longer am hurt. I no longer am worried about where Ben and I will be in six months. So be it. Why am I worried about that anyways? He's already taken care of that; we just haven't gotten there yet!

He is before ALL things, and in HIM all things hold together. - Colossians 1:17

Are you so foolish? After beginning with the Spirit, are you now trying to attain your goal by human effort? - Galatians 3:3

So, thanks, God, for the whop. I was able to share this peace with my mom and Ben yesterday. I hope I encouraged them with what I experienced and my new lease on life. Jesus is peace.

Random Fun Parrish Family Fact: After so much praying and thought yesterday, Ben and I took a cue from my parents in times of uncertainty: we went through our Bibles, wrote encouraging verses on computer paper and taped them throughout the house. That should get us through the next few months. Even Charlotte has one she can look at over her crate! :)